My desktop have no sound for like 4 days or so already. Super annoyed. Cause I can't hear anything! I want sound card but I doesn't have it. I use portable speakers and it doesn't work. What on earth does this stupid desktop want from me? Bitch.

Super super annoyed. I don't know why on earth are you treating me like that. Super pissed, super annoyed, super irritated, super felt like we have distant apart. Oh FUCK.

This cute BFF of mine go pierce his lips by his own. I bet it's muthafucking pain. I will never do that ;x But BFF, please take care of your piercing okay? Or else it might have infections!! Okay okay?

Went town yesterday and going out today. Probably not town? I'm not sure where I'm going. But I'm not going out with my boyf. Going out with friend instead. He ain't feeling well this few days and I don't know what's wrong with him. He treats me so differently. Felt that we have really distant apart. Felt that he is so unfimilar to me. Blog again. ciaos.

Isn't having a very pleasant day today even tho I should have a pleasant day today. Everything was smooth till late afternoon where everything changed. I really don't understand why history always repeats itself for me and it just seems like it had gone worst then what I had expected. I'm super exhausted now. However, I still need to get myself on my feets to face all the situation that I had. O level is gone now. I have one less pressure pressing against me. But I still have lots and lots of pressure within me. I need someone to talk to, someone who will understands how I feel, someone who would let me vent my anger on, someone who would comfort me and show me the direction where I should walk, where I should heed to.

I don't know whether you will read this or not..

The problem between my boyf and me never seems to get resolved. Quarrels after quarrels over the same thing. Yes, I am the one making a big fuss out of it. If I wouldn't care, I would not do that. If I really doesn't care, I would not even want to take this thing to show attitude towards you. I want you to know where you are wrong at. I want you to know that words should not be taken for granted. I want you to know that promises are not meant to be broken. I want you to know that by saying sorry is useless. I want you to know that do action to show that you are sorry and that you would not do that again. I want you to know that I care for you so much that I am breaking down emotionally and mentally.

I really hate the way you treat me. The way you talked to me. I really hate it. But I still bear with it because it's you. I can't change you and I doesn't want to change you. But I really hate the way you talk to me. It always bring tears to my eyes which I doesn't want to show. I just want you to know. But when I tell you, you just said that this is how the way you talk. I should have know that this is how the way you talked. I doesn't like it but what to do? I have to accept it and silently let my tears dry up at one corner. I don't know how to communicate with you properly. When I showed a lil attitude, you would show me even greater attitude. I know it's my fault for showing attitude in the first place, but I want you to know that why I showed you attitude in the first place. What had happened that I showed you attitude. However, it just seems like I have to tell you everything then you would know.

Does compromising salvage anything?

I'm having headaches plus my leg is swollen for I don't know what reason and I feel super mentally corrupted. Help me, anyone.

I LOVEEE MY BUN!

I love uploading huge quality photos! Don't ask me why. I just love things to be big! And I want my pictures to be big so can see properly! So anyways, I have Biology paper tomorrow and I still went out. Power right? I'm going to burn midnight oil today to study my biology for tomorrow! Hope the paper would be straight forward. So I don't have to crack my brain too much. And I hope that I would not keeps falling asleep. I'm super afraid. As I'm feeling super sleepy now, I still have to burn midnight oil. On top of that, I'm having my menses! So it's like I'm double tired. Any suggestions to boost my mentality? Red bull doesn't help, at all ):

So I spend my night yesterday painting. Painting for my boyf. I paint his face on a plain tee shirt which cost me $10 okay. The outcome of the back of the tee shirt isn't that nice. I'm super not satisfied. I'm sorry! He doesn't like the back also. My heart is breaking already! ): So anyway, I slept at around 230 yesterday and woke up at 1030 today. Watched vv drama on channel 55. The show is so addicting. I went to get myself prepared to go to my boyf house. I was prepared at 1pm. I went to the living room and sit down and watch vv drama again. After which I took cab to his house. Cost me like 8 bucks. Heart pain. Reached his house. He was sleeping so I took the opportunity to study for my biology! After which he was awake and he went to bath blah blah. I went to hougang mall to get a new pair of heels and I love it. Cause it's super comfortable!

Went Bugis after that. Shop for clothes for my boyf. Cause I want to do a make over for him. We shop shop there then went pastamania to eat. After which went home cause he have to go to work. He won't be working tomorrow. So going to spend a lil longer time with him. I wanna reach home like 11 plus tomorrow! My boyf super blur! But he always bully me ):

Biology paper tomorrow. Wish me luck!









Look super big can. Cause I'm wearing two shirts!




Woke up in the morning and get prepared to go his house.





My outfit for today with high heels!









Look at his face. Like wanna die can :(

I did not update my blog for a long time and I guess nobody is reading my blog already! Please come back readers, so that my tagboard would be alive again. It just seems super dead. Come back alright. I'm going to blog often already since I'm left with 2 papers for 'O' levels. O levels are going to finish just in a blink of an eye. Super fast can, 2 weeks going to be gone soon! Going to relax and work to earn money to get myself a laptop. This desktop always broke down on me. Felt super irritated.

Anyway, I'm have uploaded the photos took on Friday, 9th of October. That day where the class celebrated Mr Heng and my birthday and Mr Koh belated birthday. Had a great time and thanks for everthing. Photos credits to Sarah.

And it's my boyf birthday today! HAPPY BIRTHDAY BOYF.
You know that I love you. So don't have to elaborate more (:
Hope you will like the present I'm going to give you tomorrow (:

I would like to thank Iman too for helping me sooo much and visiting my blog everyday.
Love you!!!

1 year is going to end just like that. It just passed so fast that I felt as tho I'm still in June where I'm still relaxing and preparing for my prelims. Time really past very fast yet I have not really moved at all. Everyone is moving but why does I seems to stand at the same spot after years? I have not walked out of my dilemma. I chose not to face it and I chose to hide from it. But how long could I hide from it and not go and face it? Up till now, you are still giving me faces to see. What did I do to you that I deserve this? You think I feel comfortable with you always either sitting in front or behind me during the examination hall? I always have a sense of urge to kill or scold you whenever you are just like 2 metres way from me. You had made a big impact my life. Yes, you had succed in doing so.

For the past 3 years, I have realized that I had changed so much. I did right, friends?



I decided to post this photo because I just realized that my smile look super sweet in this photo! Haha!



My turn to blow my cake. I blow it for 3 times can.



My uniform look so effing big :( Makes me look fat.



Ali is the biggest pervet but a good friend!



Leslie face look so stern.



Poor Ali.



I look sooooooooo chubby. Stupid face!



So censor! I go point middle finger ;x

And last but not least, a photo of meee!

Went to meet Iman on Wednesday. Had a great time with him even tho it's only 2 hour plus. Anyway, I'm late to meet him. Felt super sorry! And he didn't sleep like the night before yet he is still meeting me. sweet of him. Furthermore, he have lessons at 3pm and he was available during 11am - 3pm. That somehow explains why I meet him tho. Haha.

I have no motivation to study. FUCKING MOTIVATE ME!

Went to study with Jin Siang and Zhi Keong at airport today. Like finally someone ask me out to study! Anyway, they are later then me and they LIED to me that they are earlier then me can! So what the toot right!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I did study and it did involved myself to it. I somehow or some what found motivation to study.

Study, study, study.

Anyway, there you go Iman. Your photo. BE HONORED OKAY! Your picture so big!

Would I be able to see the same sunset with the same feelings again?

I have been not in the right state of feelings or mood right now. Right now at such crucial period. Where my "O" levels are just next week, less then a week ahead. I still could sit down here and blog. Still have the time to be so emotionally affected. I don't know why, everything had came back to me again where I actually tried to let go a few months ago. Somehow the burden just won't burn away. It just keeps coming back and hunt me. I want to shake it away but it wasn't easy for me. I just couldn't let go. If I could let go, I actually did let go like years ago. Right now at this crucial period, I had lost my motivation to study. I just can't motivate myself to study. Even I'm studying, nothing could get into my head. It's been a week that I have been sitting on my art. It's been days I have been sitting on my other subjects, not studying at all. I know that I should not have let my emotions affect me. But somehow.. If I could don't let it affect me, I would not be like that.

Perhaps because what had happened on Friday had caused me to be like this too. Today was graduation day. But I did not attend at all. Want to know why? Because I felt that I don't have to attend it at all. Why must I attend and be FORCED to take photo with someone I doesn't like at all? Why not you put yourself in my shoes and think for me? Would you like to take photo with someone who you dislike? Someone who you have conflict with and is not resolved? I hate people to force me. I hate even more with the person who force me to do stuffs without my consent to it. That's why I make such a big hu-ha on Friday. Actually I did not want to attend but I was thinking that since it was the last day in school, why not I just go. But it just seems like it's pointless. I should not have attend it at all such that it got me so emotionally tangled up. THANKS for making me feel this way. Don't try to talk out of me of letting it go. You all doesn't know me well. She shall watch her steps.

Being so emotionally tangled up, nobody could understands how I feel. And I mean it, NOBODY!

I know that I have not been updating my blog! As I'm busying studying outside, I hardly have the time to update even tho I still spend time with my computer, I still did not update. Cause I did not have much stuffs to update about. But I decided to blog something before nobody visit my blog at all! You people tag my blog okay. Just feels that my blog is so dead!!

Anyway, everything is fine between my boyfriend and me. We had a lot of quarrels this past few weeks. I just had a heart to heart talk with him just now when I met him. I wanna let him know how I felt. Or else we are going to quarrel again over me feeling empty and lonely!! At least now he knows how I feel, so next time when I flare he will understand how I feels! haha. (I HOPE :X)

O LEVELS IS COMING. I'M FREAKING MYSELF OUT!!!!!!